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I am considering a move to Dubai and am researching about dating opportunities . I am a matured woman looking for a serious relationship with.

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I have been single for so long, and in that time I have been incredibly picky about how I spend every one of my moments.

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But it was time to let go. It was time to realize that I have never truly known if all that control I was exerting was empowering or stifling. Oh, the power of social media. And the regret of proclaiming something online when you should keep your social media mouth shut. I finally braved the downtown crowd and got there. It was at a small but hip hotel bar. I could give you a play-by-play of what happened from there, but why do that when I can skip around and tell you what you really want to know?

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Did I meet the love of my life? I work in statistics, and knew the probability of that happening would be slim to none. I actually asked another female participant if she expected to meet the love her life. She was petite and in her early 40s; she wore jeans, no makeup, and had short salt-and-pepper hair. I am done chasing ghosts.

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Did I have stiff competition? I honestly have no idea. What I do know is that the few women I met were delightful. Friendly, at ease, genuine. What were the men like?

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  • They were the guys who, in most social situations, might watch rather than participate. They might get overlooked for men with more bravado and better physiques. This all made them more interesting to me. They had regular jobs — in real estate, in business, at a bank, etc. They wore regular clothes — one guy had stitched jeans very , one wore a convincing fake leather jacket yes, I touched it , some wore blazers, one a full suit he came straight from work.

    One was really tall. One was really short. They talked about regular things — hobbies, their jobs, where they grew up. There was conversation about eating healthy, not wanting kids, how East Coast cities are so close in proximity compared to Southern cities, how the gym is a great place to meet people because everyone is high on endorphins.

    We talked about how great the city we live in is. One guy liked country dancing. One guy asked me to describe my greatest success at work. I believe in changing your lifestyle. A couple of the guys wore so much cologne that I could smell it on me while driving home the smell lingered after I shook their hands. Overall, it felt like a whirlwind.

    To talk to date after date, to hear and absorb so much information… it was confusing. Despite the confusion, one thought resonated clearly above everything else: This might sound obvious, but let me explain. When your heart gets broken several times over, and you spend a couple of years vigilantly detached from romantic intimacy for the sake of self-preservation, your mind starts imagining meaningful romance as a complicated thing. It seems hard and weird and too much trouble.

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    It becomes something for everyone else. You see friends get married, stay married, and build long-lasting relationships while you tag along as a third wheel. When you see your path ahead of you, you see yourself in it alone. And you settle into it because the alternative seems too difficult. But then there I was, sitting in a row of women who had also had their hearts broken, talking to men who had also had their hearts broken, and realizing that my fears and pains were average.

    My situation was average. We were all sitting there, talking, sharing… the walking wounded… trying to make a connection.

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    The humanness of it was palpable, and the whole thing actually quite simple. When it was over, the guys lingered, hoping some of the women would stay. I noticed that none of them were lingering near me; I also noticed feeling relief about that.